Funny Stuff

Hypothetically, what would one do if he/she were given a cow ?

Well I was clueless until someone sent me a mail on it.

So here we have it, famous personalities (mostly Indian) and their cow treatment culture…

So hilarious

What if you have a cow ?

Advaniism - You have two cows. You dont milk them. You worship them.

Chandrababuism - You have two cows in Vijayawada. You hook them to internet and milk them from Hyderabad

Jayalalithaism - You have two cows. You teach them to cry, “Ammaaaaaaa…” and fall at your feet.

Karunanidhiism - You have two cows. You give one to your son and the other to your nephew.

Gandhism - You have two cows. But you drink goat’s milk.

Indiraism - You have two bulls. You adamantly consider them as cows.

Lalooism - You have two cows. You buy Rs. 900 Crore worth of cattlefeed for them.

Rajnikantism - You have two cows. You throw them into air and catch their milk in your mouth.

Rajivism - You have two cows. You paint them both to get colourful milk.

Thakreyism- You have two cows. You feed them only saffron

Vajpayeeism - You have two cows. You distribute the milk among your partners and eat cattlefeed.

Veerappanism-You have two cows. You take over a reserved forest to feed them

Azharism - You have only one cow. You take money from bookies to maintain it.

Bushism - You have as many cows as you like. You preach to others not to have any.

Musharrafism - Nawaz Sharif has two cows. Take them over.

Osamaism - You have two cows. You convert them into biological weapons

Talibanism - You have two cows. You put them in purdah.

UN-ism - You have two cows. You dont milk them; you only lecture to them.

Softwarism: Client has 2 cows and u need to milk them
1 First prepare a document when to milk them (Project kick off)
2 Prepare a document how long you have to milk them (Project plan)
3 Then prepare how to milk them (Design)
4 Then prepare what other accessories are needed to milk them (Framework)
5 Then prepare a 2 dummy cows (sort of toy cows) and show to client the way in which u will milk them (UI Mockups & POC)
6 If client is not satisfied then redo from step 2
7 You actually start milking them and find that there are few problem with accessories. (Change framework)
8 Redo step 4
9 At last milk them and send it to onsite. (Coding over)
10 Make sure that cow milks properly ( Testing)
11. Onsite reports that it is not milking there.
12. You break your head and find that onsite is trying to milk from bulls
13. At last onsite milk them and send to client (Testing)
14. Client says the quality of milk is not good. (User Acceptance Test) 15. Offsite then slogs and improves the quality of milk
16. Now the client says that the quality is good but its milking at slow rate (performance issue)
17. Again you slog and send it with good performance.
18. Client is happy??? By this time both the COWs aged and cant milk. (Thesoftware got old and New software has come in market)

More Funnies :